20.) Bill Simmons
His switch to ESPN was the first step that led to millions of other sports blogs, including the one that I am writing today. Sure, his quality has dropped off considerably in recent years, and he seems to think way too much of himself and his more talented friends, but Simmons' influence cannot be understated. He waved in a new era of sports writing, where talent was less important than relatability and style. Simmons' wit and pop culture prose entertained millions for years and years. The sports pop-culture world now knows what the 'Diane Lane All-Stars', what the 'Ewing Theory' is, and just how maddening Boston sports fans can be.
19.) CSI
CBS is today the leading network for scripted shows by far (this means not counting what American Idol and Dancing With the Stars does to FOX's and ABC's rating) and CSI is the main reason why. It is now the leading scripted franchise on television and ushered in the great era of scripted forensic science shows. Shows like Law and Order and NYPD Blue had been around for years, but they focused on the law, CSI focused on the science, and strangely, nerdy science was more popular. CSI has now branched to other cities and other stars from its premier season in 2000, but its true brilliance is seen by the rest of the CBS drama line-up, with essentially CSI knockoffs in NCIS, NCIS: Los Angeles, NUMB3RS, Cold Case and more. CSI has become the most bankable scripted show franchise on television and has helped CBS reach the top of the network world.
18.) Random Girls Who Don't Do Anything
I don't even feel like spending time on them, but Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Richie and Birtney Spears sent the entire decade in the news all the time, and sadly very rarely for anything constructive. They were the four hurricanes that rocked the paparazzi seemingly every day. One week one appears without underwear, the next week another shaves her head. One week the get engaged to ship tycoons with the same name, the next they get married to two losers in the span of eight months. For the 2000s no women were more notorious than these four, the four women that showed that fame could emit from no talent at all.
17.) Lost
Ah, yes the show that is more known for being complex than anything else. Lost really became the most watched cult show ever. It had fans that dissected episodes frame by frame, investigating every moment of the show for evidence of this or that. It became a religion more than just a show, with myths and stories. Are they alive? Are they in heaven? Is this a metaphor? Why can't this island be found considering every island on earth has been found? Whatever the answer will be, and we will find them all out later this year, Lost has become the greatest cult drama of the 2000s.
16.) 24
Back in 2004, when I was in 8th grade, I was asked a question from a friend. It was simple. It was, "Do you watch 24?" I had no idea what this meant. I was in the dark. I quickly found out that not only did most of my thirteen and fourteen year old classmates know what '24' was, they watched it. Everyone watched it. 24 has really seen its popularity and craze dry out the past two years, but for a two year period there was no bigger show in the world. 24 was a perfect set up, twenty-four episodes, all one hour. One day, one problem, one thousand people laying in Jack Bauer's path ready to be slaughtered. Kiefer Sutherland landed the dream job of a lifetame, and made Jack Bauer into the most famous agent in the world.
15.) Deadspin/TMZ
These two sites were launched just two months apart in 2005, and they really changed the world far more than anyone knows. TMZ.com became the mother of all paparazzi sites for celebrities, taking in tips and photos and recorded videos, and even cell-phone transcripts portraying all the dirty things that celebrities do... in the dark. Deadspin essentially did the same thing for athletes, which unearthed the previously untouched subject of what highly paid athletes do in their free time. Amazingly, both things involved inebriated people doing salacious things to young women in dark bars and clubs. Deadspin has at least branched out in pure Simmons style to writing hilarious columns, and even spawned into kissingsuzykolber.com, a site that has revolutionized sports satire. To think just six years ago no one would have ever known what athlete used the alias 'Ron Mexico' when trying to pick up hookers (Michael 'Yes, Damnit I killed Dogs' Vick) or what celebrity disregards the usual social law of wearing things to cover ones vaginal area.
14.) The Black Eyed Peas
In 2003, a group of crazy looking mixed racial fellows and one voluptious woman banded together to release a underrated hit in 'Where is the Love?', and the Peas were born. The Black Eyed Peas took advantage of all the goodwill they earned by brilliantly releasing the song with moral character first, and knocked off hit after hot hit. First came 'Shut Up', then 'Hey Mama', then 'Let's get Retarded', then 'Don't Phunk with my Heart', 'My Humps', 'Pump It!', 'Boom Boom Pow', 'I Got A Feeling', 'Meet Me Halfway', and 'Imma Be.' They evolved from a novelty mixed-racial band that produced a sweet tome to saving humanity, to the best collaborative group of the 2000s. Fergie and the Boys did well, didn't they?
13.) XBOX Live
So, yes, its not technically related to pop culture, but video games are, and XBOX Live is responsible for all the video game developments of the past decade. Halo (and parts II and III) became one of the greatest video game crazes of all time, and mainly due to XBOX Live. All EA Sports games now have live gameplay, because of XBOX Live. Sony had to develop a live gaming system for PS3 to compete with XBOX Live. XBOX won the third generation war (beating the Wii and PS3) with XBOX 360 mainly because of XBOX Live. It is safe to say that the best thing that Bill Gates' brainchild created in the 2000s was a live gaming operation.
12.) Desperate Housewives
The ladies from Wisteria Lane created a huge ruckus when first released back in September 2004, and the drama and controversy has not lessened since. Desperate Housewives is now the most popular scripted show starring women ever. Susan, Gaby, Lynnette and Bree took the tv world by storm, all getting nominated for best actress in season 1. Their story-lines were even more ingenious, as they have been able to keep a show with all women-centric storylines relevant and original for six years now. Marc Cherry never anticipated the success that Housewives has given him, but really, when you put five hot forty-somethings housewives together, you really can't go wrong.
11.) Dan Brown and the Church
Angels & Demons was released in 2000. A minor blip was made on the literary and Vatican radar. The DaVinci Code came out three years later, and the literary world and the Vatican went batshit. It became the biggest religious firestorm in decades, and the biggest book of the decade. It had outrageous accusations that belied the foundation of the world's biggest religion. It besmerched the name of Rome's greatest luminary. It rocked the politico-religious landscape for years, and made Dan Brown millions and the church into a victim. The fact alone that any man can write a book about religion and have it sell millions of copies and it not be named the 'Bible', that was the biggest surprise.
10.) Anchorman
I was going to give Judd Apatow this spot. Then I was going to share it between Will Ferrell and Apatow, but really it's Anchorman all the way. It is the most quoted comedy of the decade. It released the most one-liners ("A whale's vagina", "San Diegans", "Brick, did you kill a guy with a trident"). It gave the world the greatest easy-to-copy voice in Ron Burgundy's deep drawl. I'm pretty sure 90% of Americans who were between 13 and 18 when Anchorman came out know the back-and-forth that crescendo's to the "I'm going to punch you in the ovaries" line by heart. It is the movie that defined comedy in the 2000s. Get some funny people that can ad-lib, and put in Ferrell, and you have yourself an iconic movie that will live forever.
9.) PIXAR
Sure, they got their start with the Toy Story's in the 90's, but starting with 'Monsters, Inc.' in 2001, PIXAR went on a run that was probably unmatched in the decade, animated or not. 'Finding Nemo' is the Anchorman of animated comedies from the decade. 'The Incredibles', 'Cars', and 'Ratatouille' provided nice, cute fun. However, with 'Wall-E' and 'Up' PIXAR entered into the new wave of animation head-first and became legitimate Oscar fodder in categories that do not include the worlds "animated." 'Up' and 'Wall-E' are actual, beautiful, moving films that happen to be animated. 'Finding Nemo' and 'Monsters, Inc.' are actual, hi-larious comedies that happen to be animated. Animation will never have the success that PIXAR had in the 2000s, mainly because PIXAR did it too well.
8.) Beyonce
The best woman artist of the decade checks in at number eight, and this is not at all due to her time with Destiny's Child. She was a 'Survivor', living through Destiny's acrimonious break, and came out as a pop and sex icon. It started with 'Crazy in Love' back in 2003, and evolved through all sorts of styles, from lust and sexuality like 'Naughty Girl', to beautiful introspection like 'Irreplacable.' Beyonce has become an establishment; the Madonna of her day. She is an icon in every sense of the world, and is by far the most powerful woman in music today. Today is she Mrs. Jay-Z, a fashion mogul and a movie star. It is amazing to believe that she was arguably the second most famous Child of Destiny ten years ago.
7.) Arrested Development
Believe me, this is not the last time I will write about this brilliant show, and for good reason. Arrested Development is probably the only thing on this list that did not have huge commercial success. It is the only TV show to be canceled before it hit syndication (100 episodes). It is the best sitcom of the 2000s, by far. Arrested Development lives on over the interwebs, as half of people's usernames on blogs are some Arrested Development joke. Every character was brilliant. Every episode was funny. Every line had some relevance, either be it an obvious funny line, or some background joke related to some other thing in the episodes. Arrested Development was pure sitcom glory. The writing was great, the acting better, the casting even better. They were the perfect family for TV. And they were the only sitcom to really ever write a female character well for the entire run of the show in Matriarch Lucille Bluth. Arrested Development is rumored to come back on the big screen, but the small screen version was sitcom perfection.
6.) Survivor
The show that started the reality era in TV, it is probably the most influential TV show of the decade. The show has now become one blurry mess of tropical islands and dares and Jeff Probst, but when it first came out in 2000, it was the most brilliant idea on TV. Set in Borneo, and won by a dick named Richard Hatch, Survivor captivated the country, drawing 28.3 million viewers. That was an insane amount for a, horror, "reality tv show" back then. All reality shows, especially those like the Amazing Race and Fear Factor, owe it to Survivor for making them profitable. And Survivor still does it better than anyone else, 20 seasons later.
5.) The Lord of the Rings
I'll be honest. I have never seen any of the three movies. Really. I have not. I probably never will because there's a hauntingly sweet feeling to be totally blind to something that 98% of the populous has. Yet, I am able to understand its crazy significance. It was the only book-to-movie series that could actually, for a time, knock 'Harry Potter' of the map, and mainly because of Elijah Wood and Orlando Bloom. Those two people, among other orcs, and other random shits, turned the world of wherever Lord of the Rings takes place and turn in into the most popular fantasy land in movies in the decade. The Lord of the Rings crowning moment was the 2004 Academy Awards where The Return of the King one everything in sight, and made enough money to ensure Peter Jackson stays obese for life. I don't think JRR Tolkien would have ever imagined that his brainchild would become the second most famous book series of the last 20 years.
4.) Eminem
Again, I will one day write a much longer tome to the brilliance that was Eminem, but the shady (pun intended), white rapper from South Detroit turned rap upside down, made in the most popular music form of the new millenium, and sold more albums and earthed more controversy than any r&b/hip hop/rap artist in any one decade. From the absolutely perfect 'Marshall Mathers LP' to the more commercially loved 'Eminem Show' to everything else Marshall N. Mathers tried to do in the 2000s, brilliance ensued. He is the guy that made D12 into something, the guy who made 50-Cent a millionaire instead of an oft-shot gangster. He made '8 Mile' into the most known street in the United States west of New York City and east of Los Angeles. The most telling thing about Eminem's industry-wide brilliance is that he is an arrogant white-rapper who has spent the decade insulting every established black person in the industry, and not a single person has taken a shot at him. There is no point of taking a shot at brilliance.
3.) The iPod (and other i-Tems)
It was only nine years ago that no one knew what an iPod was, and the iMac was still the largest Apple creation. Boy did Steve Jobs change things. The iPod has been updated so much in the past decade, that the original version is completely unrecognizable, but it is truly the only portable innovation (excluding the laptop, and I guess, the car) that is world-known and world-used. Who doesn't have an iPod, let alone an iTouch or iPhone. However, Jobs' later, more useful inventions, never had the same amazing impact as the iPod. The iPod revolutionized the music industry from top-to-bottom, from making CDs irrelevant to fixing the Napster problems. The iPod is almost irrelevant now because of the iTouch and the iPhone, but its legacy will live on as Apple continues to rule the non-Computer e-world.
2.) American Idol
It's nauseating now. It's gone a couple years too far (its in year NINE now). The judges are now all in dissary, with Paula already gone (thank GOD!!), and Simon following her (R.I.P Idol), but it is still undoubtedly the most important and relevant show (or anything in video) of the 2000s. American Idol was the perfect match between comedy, drama and reality. It had a funny, caustic, arrogant, prick of a man in Cowell. It had the hip guy. It had the person who everyone could laugh at in vetted disgust in Paula. It had the drama of people going balls out to win a singing contest. It had the comedy of the idiots who couldn't sing for anything. It created stars all over the place. Ironically, few of them were winners, but that's the beauty of Idol. It was a singing contest, sure, but it was more of a pop culture contest. If you could win some sector of pop culture, wether it be actual singing talent (Kelly Clarkson, Jennifer Hudson), acting talent (Hudson), hotness (Carrie Underwood), pubescent girls fawning (David Archuleta, Clay Aiken (funny how that one turned out, isn't it)), or even the new media culture of making stars out of people with no talent (William Hyung). American Idol was perfect for its first five or six years. It got huge, huge viewer totals. More people voted for the season three finale than the 2004 and 2008 election COMBINED. American Idol capitalized on Survivor making reality tv legitimate and perfected it into a rare amalgam of everything TV had to offer.
1.) Harry Potter Mania
Books, movies, whatever it may be, Harry Potter could do no wrong. Even though the first three books were all released in the 1990's, the series became huge prior to the release of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. How huge? There were millions of kids world-wide who stood in line waiting until the stroke of midnight for the release of a BOOK. Not a movie. This wasn't star wars, this was a book. In a world where kids are turning further away from reading, it is ridiculous that a book can have this much impact. It's hard to describe what made the books so brilliant, but they just are. Getting a 10 year old to read 700 pages is about as hard as getting Bill Belichick to laugh, but J.K. Rowling was able to do it. I mean, the woman's a billionaire. She wrote BOOKS for a living, and she has more money than Madonna. The mania transfered quite easily to the big screen, as the movie series started in 2001, and nine years later is still as popular as anything else. The kids who grew up with Harry Potter are all in college now, yet all of us will flock to theatres to see the final two installments that comprise the seventh book. The books have made the lives of Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson forever changed. It has made the world of wizardry changed. It has made Lord Voldermort the greatest literary villain ever, and Hogwarts the greatest literary school ever. Harry Potter mania knew no limits. There were the books, which begat dolls, and christmas ornaments, and computer games, and pens, and color books and anything possible. I was there waiting in line one day in 2000 when J.K. Rowling was doing a book signing in New Jersey. I stood outside in line for six hours waiting to meet her. I never did, but we were able to finagle our books to some other people and got one signed. I waited six hours to meet an author, wasn't able to, and didn't complain one bit, and I would do it again. Why? Because it was Harry Potter, that's why.
