Year End Trip of 2017-18, Pt. 1: Travel and Layovers, Argentina Style

I haven't taken a full family trip in many years. To be fair, I'm making a few exclusions with that statement, excluding domestic trips, weekend trips, and our family trip to India to end 2015 (India is many things, a vacation? unsure). The last one, in my skewed way of parsing the meaning of 'family trip' was in 2010, when we all went to Greece together. It's been a while. And that streak will finally end. Of course, us being us, with four working adults now, we all didn't take the same flight, with my sister joining in tomorrow, and her boyfriend on the fourth day. But this starts with as all trip diaries should, the flight(s) to get there, and the fortunate layover in Buenos Aires in between.

The trip will encompass 11 days spread between Argentina and Chile, most of which being in Patagonia. Following the short layover in Buenos Aires, we will be in Punta Arenas for two and a half days, then El Calafate (home of the Perito Moreno Glacier) for two and a half days, and Puerto Natales (nearest out-post of Torres del Paine National Park) for two days, before heading back up to Santiago and the Colchagua Wine Region for four days to end the trip. This first entry is about the flight(s) to Punta Arenas, and the layover in Buenos Aires to start.


American Airlines.... Not so bad

Buenos Aires is very far from New York. It takes about 10 to 10.5 hours to reach. I had to spend this time on American Airlines. I try to spend as little time on international medium and long haul flights on any american airline as possible. I'll get a slightly longer flight from Santiago back to New York on LATAM to end the trip, so at least I don't have to experience it again. However, after actually experiencing it, I have to say that American surprised me.

As a snotty United frequent flier I was slightly miffed to not be in 'Group 1' for a change, but we entered the plane early enough, got enough overhead-bin space, and relaxed into our fairly comfortable seats, with an HD personal AVOD TV, and decent recline. What I love about flights 10+ hours is you can eat your initial meal, watch a movie, sleep 6 hours, and then watch another movie. I did all of that the way I wanted. The food was decent, with Orzo and Chicken as a dinner, and a blueberry muffin with yogurt for breakfast. My first movie was Skyfall, which somehow I missed years ago (very good), and the second was Logan Lucky, which sure I've seen before but is slowly rising up my list of guilty pleasure movies.

My only complaint with the American flight at all was the ridiculous temperature of the cabin. It was freezing. I have no idea what the reason was, but the cabin temp was calibrated all wrong. The only similar experience I'd had was on EMB-145 jets on short-hops in winter, where I'm half certain the issue was the plane was too small and the walls too thin to keep the cold air out. It shouldn't happen on a 777-200ER. There were a few huge positives however with AA. First, comes the ridiculously cold beer they served. One of the coldest I have ever had on a plane (maybe the internal cabin temp helped here?). Then came the quality of the screens, about as close to real HD as I have seen in an economy cabin. On the whole, American's service was a pleasant surprise, and although due to convenience and current status, I won't be leaving United soon, but that was a truly pleasant surprise.


Other Travel Escapades

My other two flights were rather milquetoast, if efficient. They were both short, a two-hour jaunt from Buenos Aires to Santiago, and a three hour schlep from Santiago down to Punta Arenas. The first flight was on LATAM, and it was a strange mix of international and domestic service. On the international side, we had a large plane for a 2-hour flight (B767-300ER), and AVOD (I watched, big surprise, Ocean's 11 after finding nothing else too inspiring). On the domestic side, the 'food' they gave was a seriously uninspiring. Having taken an overnight flight on LATAM last year (Lima to New York), I expect my 11-hour flight from Santiago to New York will be a whole lot better.

As for the domestic flight from Santiago to Punta Arenas, it was on a Chilean low-cost airline, Sky Airlines. It was a truly no-frills service reminiscent of AirAsia, an Asian low-cost carrier that I took one too many times on my Round the World Trip in 2013. They charged for water (it was cheap, at least), and didn't have any seats that recline. They had decent enough legroom, a fully adequate internal cabin temperature (something I will be much more alert for going forward). I slept for most of the flight, which I hope to do equally so on the flight back.

The airports I had to experience were all interesting to various degrees., One feature I really liked in both Buenos Aires and Santiago, the two places we had to go through immigration, are their immigration lines had automated boards at the front which told you which kiosk to go to. Buenos Aires airport was somewhat uninspiring for a city its size (in my limited experience with Lima airport it was slightly more advanced). That said, Buenos Aires airport was opening a new terminal which could quickly improve things. Santiago airport was similar, though we were mostly in the domestic area which understandably is less built up than the International side.

Punta Arenas airport was similar to the old Bangalore Airport, more of a warehouse than an actual port. Not a huge surprise given Punta Arenas is a fairly small city, but it is a tourism hub. The real issue so far was with the rental car people. We had booked an SUV with Europcar, all set to go, but when we got to the counter we were informed that if we are taking the car into Argentina, we had to apply for a permit that for some reason took Europcar 4 days to turnaround - days we didn't have. While this was indisputably our fault (we should have found out about this issue), the Europcar lady seemed almost gleeful to tell us that she could not give us the car in adequate time. Again, as a snotty frequent traveler, I was seething - moreso because this was not Hertz or National, the two car rental groups I usually use and can therefore pull some strings with.

We ended up getting a last-minute rental with some local vendor for cheaper. The only downside was that it was a manual car, and only my dad knows how to drive a stick-shift. We agreed that the roads of Argentina and Chile would not be the best place to attempt to learn, and that my Dad would, sadly, be the sole driver for this part of the trip. Given that both AVIS and Hertz had no available cars large enough, it could have been worse, as we could have spent half-day scrambling to figure out how to get to El Calafate in Argentina, but the random local RECASUR car rental company came in well.


Buenos Aires

Layovers are a strange beast. There's a lot of different components to weigh when parsing out the value of having 7-8 hours in a city. What helps these matters is having an airport easily accessible from the city center, and a quick immigration process. Ezeiza airport in Buenos Aires was neither of these things - and due to this despite arriving at 10:45, and departing at 6:20, we really had only about four hours to play with.

Our first stop was to grab lunch - trekking out to the Puenta Madero part of Buenos Aires that borders the city's river. Estilo Campo was the restaurant, a true meat-house. Given I would have only one meal in Buenos Aires, that seemed apt. Estilo Campo had a range of meat offerings, both a list of steaks (fairly expensive, even after converting), and a list of meats fresh from the spit. We decided to eschew the steak, and go with the spot, somewhat convinced by the splayed lambs over the spit-fire at the entrance. We got a lamb and a flank-steak from teh split, and beef 'rose-meat', and all three were fairly good, if a little tough. The meal was quite good - oddly a place my parents went to when they went to Buenos Aires 12 years earlier with some of their friends. Only issue was it took a little long, leaving us with a little less time to see some of the city.

What we ended up doing was essentially go through a driving tour of the city. We had a number of carry-on bags we had to lug around, propping up the idea of booking a cab to ferry us around and hold the stuff. Luckily for us the random cab driver we could get to agree to this proposal was a nice enough guy to give us a good tour. We saw the main areas around Avenida 9 de Julio, including the Congress, the Palacio de Justicia, el Teatro Campo (a place I would have taken a tour of had I had more time), and various other European-looking buildings that encompass the heart of Buenos Aires.

My first impression of the city during the drive from the airport was fairly negative, with it looking a bit poorer and less developed than I had envisioned, but after Lima, or Split, I should have learned better than to judge by these quasi-central locations. The heart of Buenos Aires was very reminiscent of Europe - wide esplanades, monuments and splendid architecture, all with little lanes and alleys jutting out from all angles. My time in Buenos Aires was limited - my main goal was to get a feel for the city and assess how likely I would be to go back - and I definitely think the city hit those marks.

Our final stop before heading back to the airport was an outpost in The Recolata, a more upscale neighborhood in the center-north part of the city. The Recolata's main tourist attraction is the graveyard that houses the grave of Eva Peron, among other less famous dignitaries. The graveyard was insane, a tight area with incredibly ornate graves stacked right next to each other like very fancy row-houses. Eva Peron's grave itself wasn't too impressive to stand out from the crowd, in that sense. Neighboring the graveyard was the adjoining church, which was somehow a basilica despite being far less ornate or 'special' than the Catedral Metropolitan. We ended our quick stay in Buenos Aires with a coffee in a restaurant with outdoor seating in the main square - a perfect way to end the day.

Overall, I of course wish I had more time in Buenos Aires, but I definitely accomplished what I set out to do. All I wished for was to experience what Buenos Aires is like - in no way expecting to fully make an impression on its long list of sites. I now know I need to go back, and better yet I would want to. I also got a good second view of layover logistics. My last real layover that I fully utilized was four years ago on my round-the-world trip, where I had two separate layovers in Singapore, but those were nearly full day affairs. This wasn't. It was a constrained set of time, and given the challenges those provided, I have to say we did quite well.

Year End Trip of 2017-18, Day 5 - El Calafate & Perito Moreno Glacier

Day 5 - Glacial Trekking

We came to Patagonia with a lot of high expectations, and nothing had been built up more than the Perito Moreno Glacier, a key tourist attraction in Argintenean Patagonia due West of El Calafate. Two of my cousins passed along the highlights of Patagonia consistently, and both of them singled out Perito Moreno Glacier as a high point, as a once in a lifetime experience. Few sites when built up so substantially, especially by people that have traveled as extensively as both of them have, live up to the billing, but the glacier if anything exceeded it.

The drive to the glacier is a great aperitif to the enjoyable tourism meal to come, as the scenery surrounding both El Calafate, with the idyllic Lago Argentina to the north, and the endless Patagonian steppes to the South, and the creeping Andes Mountains off in the distance, combines to form an effortlessly beautiful cocktail. There were so many moments during that drive we wanted to stop and pull over, but we had a further destination in mind that needed to be reached: the glacier.

The entrance to the glacier park is fairly understated, well aways away from the actual Perito Moreno Glacier. It costs $500 Argentinean Pesos (~$27 USD) to enter, an amount more than worth it. That isn't the end of the drive, however, as ~20km of twists and turns still lie ahead, but at least that stretch of road does have the great luxury of adding in small sites of the beautiful glacier to behold. The first glimpse was a photo opp lookout about halfway in, where you first see the giant glacier overflowing between two mountains, with a lustrous mix of white and blue. As you advance towards the actual glacier area, the views get more clear, and more staggering.

The complex itself is set up nicely. There is a lower parking lot, with a restaurant and dock for boat cruises past the 'Northern Face' of the glacier, and a constant series of shuttle buses back up to the upper lot, which has the entrance to the manicured walking trails that give increidble views of the glacier across the frozen river. It is really hard to explain, so instead, let's show:



These were all views from the walking trails, series of cantilevered walkways that traipsed up, down and around the cliff-face and woods across from the glaciers. The number of places during that trail that prompt audible gasps and delight are in the dozens. You can easily fill a few hours just talking pictures at each moment that fits your fancy. Given my family's proclivity for photos and trip documentation, we probably would have, but my sister, her boyfriend and I had a time limit, as we had to make it for a 4:15 PM mini-trek up the glacier itself.

The wooden staircase trail is eaisly the most accessible part of Perito Moreno Glacier park, and gives a complete glacier experience. There are a number of trails, all color coded with enough signs to never fear getting lost. The park describes each trail in a few ways, one of which being level of difficulty, but having cut across three of the five, the suggested level of difficulty seemed fo have no correlation with how difficult it was. Still, it was incredibly well set-up and gives a range of viewpoints of the glacier.

The best part of the trail is the moments where you get to see ice calving off of the glacier face into the lake below. We saw a couple of them (not as many as normal since it was a cloudy day). It starts with a loud gunshot, the crack of the ice. Then comes a brief period before it falls off where we all look around to see where it is coming from. Then it happens, the fall, the crumble, into the water. Then, maybe the most amazing part, is the long lasting reverberations in the water, the ripple out to the shoreline. It all takes 20-30 seconds, and it is mesmerizing.

Had the day ended there, it was a job well done. Instead, the best was yet to come with the glacier trek. I'm generally not one for trekking, but this was an opportunity I could not possibly pass up. We took a boat over the the mountainside bordering the glacier, then walked across to the edge of the glacier where it meets the mountain, and were form-fitted with crampons on our shoes to be able to spike into the ice-face and not slip. 120 minutes later, when we took them off after the tour ended. I kind of felt I wanted crampons on my shoes permanently.

It is really hard to describe both the feeling and the views while trekking the glacier. It was a circle route about 90 minutes, up and down through the peaks and valleys of a corner of the South face. Two guides led the way, both helping us all up and down, and leaping across the ice to carve out a more teneble path where there was build up. The whole experience was both surreal and everything I could have imagined.

The most amazing part was just looking around at mounds of ice, varying levels of blues, crevices that went on forever, little streams of fresh glacial water in all directions. The guides helped us spot the true beautiful sites to make sure we all got an adequate number of hundreds of pictures. From afar this area of the glacier looked plain and flat, but trekking up and down and you see how vurvy and jagged it can be.

Throughout the trek we were able to scoop up little pieces of ice to chomp on (by 'we' I say mostly 'me'), but at the very end the tour includes a little sustenance as well, as we are all invited to a little whiskey on the rocks - glacier ice being the 'rock'. Given the conditions, the setting, the surreal feeling of it all, it may have been the best whiskey of my life.

It was a real downer in a way when it ended as I'm sure I just experienced the highlight of the trip. We made it back to normal ground, and headed back to El Calafate around 9:00, just in time to shop a bit and head to our dinner at La Tablita, a classic Argentinean Parilla grill restaurant. Despite the late timing, the restaurant was buzzing - we had to wait about 15 minutes for our 10PM reservation. The food also took long to come, though it was worth the wait mostly.

Parilla grills are all about meat. You basically order different meats that are cued up over the spit or grilled and served alltogether. We ordered lamb, rump, pork tenderloin and a rib-eye for all of us to share. They're cooked simply, with no added flavor or anything. Just hte natural meat, and it was all really good. The lamb may have been slightly better in Chile, but the two beef cuts were divine. I could not recommend La Tablita enough.

After dinner, not yet ready to end our time in El Calafate, my sister, her boyfriend and I went to Borges y Alvarez Libro Bar, a beautiful little spot on the main road (90% of El Calafate business is on that road) that is modeled after a library. It wasn't nearly as packed as La Zorra Taproom but still quite crowded. I got a local beer (Eurek Negra - essentially a stout), which was quite good. Overall have found Argentina beer quite good. After I got a few more pints at La Zorra, still buzzing when I left around 2:30, and called it a night.

It was a short, action packed day in El Calafate, which is a true little jewel of a town and tourist destination. The glacier met all expectations, and the trek passed them easily. Few days on any vacation have ever gone so well, been so fun, and been worth so much as a memory.

Year End Trip of 2017-18, Day 3 - Punta Arenas & Tierra del Fuego

Day 3 - Tierra del Fuego

In each of our three main tourist destinations during this trip, there is one day more or less dedicated to a single tourist attraction. The first of which is a day-long tour of Tierra del Fuego, a large expanse of land south of Punta Arenas that winnows down towards the depths of South America. The trip encompassed a lot of driving, but also a lot of history, and more than anything marvelling at the strange odd scenery on plains that make up this remote corner of our globe.

The beginning of the trip was actually mostly a repeat of yesterday, going back to the same pier where we took the ferry to Isla Magdalena, but this time we took the adjecent boat, a larger, fancier ferry that was destined for Porvinir. Our tour group's van was housed below deck. The boat ride took two hours, a nice opportunity to sleep for a bit. Our earnest, smart, an all around baller tour guide Juan ("Johnny" to the 8 of us on the tour hailing from the US) took a bit of this time to give us a geography and history lesson as well of Isla Tierra del Fuego, a large piece of land split between Chile and Argentina (quite acrimoniously, we would soon find out). The two hours seemed quicker than expected, and before we knew it, we were boarding the van on the Porvinir side.

Porvinir was a great starting point for the various bits of history that were a throughline for the entire day. First was the tales of the aboriginal peoples that once lived throughout southern Chilean Patagonia for thousands of years. These peoples were left mostly unfettered until the late 1800's and early 1900's, when the Spanish came in and summarily wiped them out. There were a few monuments in Porvinir to these people, the Sel'knam, memorializing their history, but the real place of honor was the tidy little museum to the history of the Sel'knam, the Spanish conquest, the Gold Rush that brought in, oddly enough, a slew of Croatians to the region, and the wildlife that still calls it home. The museum was well manicured, and our less well-manicured, heavily bearded guide was there to fill in the details.

The second throughline was the wildlife. The most prominent native wildlife was by far sheep, dotting so many of the vast expanse of plains and farms. The next was the Guanaco, the singular animal that would split off through evolution to the Llama and Alpaca; with the Guanaco being a smaller version of its two more notable relatives. Third was the rhea, an emu-like figure that was far too sparse to ever get a good look at. The real key was the King Penguin, but more about that later.

The next part of the trip was mostly a drive to the King Penguin colony near Cameron, part of the hilariously named 'Useless Bay' when translated - called so due to its shallow waters making it incompatible with most ships. The drive did allow us to see the flat view of Tierra del Fuego, mesmerizing in its isolation. It was, in a weird way, so unlike anything I had seen before.

The King Penguin colony was the real hit of the tour.. Despite seeing penguins just a day earlier, seeing the larger King Penguins was just an amazing experience. We could not get as close (King Penguins are fairly scared of human interaction), but their size was impressive nonetheless. They were set up near the water of Useless Bay, behind a well manicured entry-way. The wind was howling at its finest in this area, a clear message of just how close to Antarctica we were getting. The Kign Penguins were not as movile as their Megallenic cousins, but more stately and regal. Many were incumbating eggs beneath their down-feathers. Others were sleeping upright. A few were fighting and even mating.

Despite the distanace, our tourguides handy tip to combine a cell-phone camera and binoculars to get a close-up was an inspired bit of genius to enliven the experience. He really was such an asset during this trip. We learned more about his background alter during one of the endless drives, but for now he seemed to us to be part Zoologist, being able to dole out so many facts and stories about the Penguin colony and their activities. Penguins are fascinating animals, from their ability to spread self-created oil on their feathers allowing them to dive up to 300 meters in the ground, to the stories of how female penguins would stay with the same mate for life, unless one of their eggs doesn't hatch and they switch over from male to male finding the previous not verile enough. The howling winds cooled the atmosphere, but his stories and well of knowledge heated it right back up.

The rest of the trip included more driving, better scenery, views of the Straight of Magellan, and a whole lot of history. Our tour guide, who effortlessly switched back and forth from Spanish to English, seemingly majored in Patagonian history. The best part was his long story of Jose Menendez, a quasi-fraudster who swindled his way to owning basically all of Southern Patagonia, and then swindled it away. The last true stop on the tour was his deserted 'Estacionmento' (essentially, an outpost), which also had a shipwreck that was cool to waltz around, but cooler to learn was a boat that was intentionally crashed to salvage for its wood.

The final part of the trip included a shorter boat ride across the Straight of Magellan at its northern entry-way, a 20 minute ride through choppy waters where the Atlantic and Pacific currents wage daily battles. The tour ended with a bit of personal story-time, with the tourguide giving us a family history intertwined with the differing opinions and memories of the Pinochet regime, all this during the drive back to our hotel. In this he mentioned having worked in the US for a few years, but coming back to Chile. He claimed happily that he loved his job, giving these tours each day, and the next day he would be running a tour of Torres del Paine park out of Punta Arenas, one that would start about 5AM and end at 9PM. He sure does love his job, and given how much he knew about each site we saw and the general history of this region from ancestral through modern times, I buy it.

We returned from our tour just in time for dinner, which we had at Sotito's Restaurant, a fancy place bordering the Straight of Magellan. The view was divine and the food nearly as good. We had a bit of a rough start with the waiter, asking for an English menu only to realize that the English menu was paired down to include only a few options that they felt would be appetizing to 'English' people (including an Italian section that is not included in the real menu), and then asking for the Spanish one back, but by the time we ordered and got our food it was all good. We ordered a lot of dishes - some would say too much - but each was good. The star was the fresh King Crab, a specialty of the area. Other top choices were the roasted lamb, and a fried Merzluna fish. Everything was fresh and good.

My night ended at Bar The Clinic, which I picked mostly because it was down the road from dinner. It was a nice bar, with a more tourist-heavy crowd than Bar Bulnes the night before, with more of a classic bar/pub menu and drink selection. I returned to our hotel around 1:00, and not all that ready to leave Punta Arenas.

In the end, Punta Arenas is a strange town. It is the biggest city in this part of the world, certainly one of the few that have enough of an economy outside of tourism to survive independently. It is the largest gateway from a transport sense to this part of the world in Patagonia. But the main tourist attraction it houses, the expansive Torres del Paine and southern islands, aren't as stunningly picturesque as the places to come./ But the lasting sense and value of Punta Arenas and Torres del Paine really are its remoteness. I was further South than I probably will ever go, and that sense of unique isolation never escapes.

Year End Trip of 2017-18, Day 2 - Punta Arenas

Day 2 - Hanging off the World, and Penguins!

The first time I went to the Southern Hemisphere was when I went to Cape Town to start my Round the World Trip in 2013. Since leaving Cape Town, I had done so again in Australia later on that trip, in South Africa again in 2016, and now in South America. I remember that first visit to Cape Town, that weird, indescribable sense of 'I'm on the other side of the world.' For some reason, the North-South difference seems more impactful than the East-West difference (say, when traveling to India). Whatever I did feel that day in Cape Town, I felt the same times 10 in Punta Arenas.

Maybe it is the flat, earthy terrain, or the billowing winds, or the strange flora, or, and this will be a recurring theme during this visit, the fact it gets dark literally at 11:30 PM, but it just felt different. And it felt great. I'm no trekker. If I ever make it to Antarctica, it is because I have done well enough in life to afford a very pampered visit. But for me, going to Punta Arenas felt like traveling to the other end of the earth. And for a first impression, the other end of the earth is pretty great.

Our drive from Punta Arenas airport to town was uneventful, and our first stop was to get tickets for the tour of Isla Magdalena, famous for the Magellenic Penguins that call the island home. That went smoothly, giving us enough time to check in to our hotel (Hotel Rey don Felipe) and grab a quick lunch. The hotel is well made, ornate enough to provide 1st world comfort, but 'rustic' enough to make sure you know you aren't in that 1st world for some fairly good reasons.

Our lunch was similar, at El Mercado Restaurant in the heart of the city. I had looked up the place as a potential hit for a grab-and-go lunch, and it proved worthy of that distinction. We were the first people at the restaurant as Chile is a late-dining country. The menu was extensive, and we decided to focus on fish. Putting aside a semi-language-barrier-related issue with our Calamari (we thought we were getting it with a suace and it came normal but still good), the food was great. My dad and I split a Conger Eel (a Patagonian specialty) that was covered with a perfect amount of cream sauce, spiced just well enough. The fish was incredibly fresh, and grilled lightly enough to hold most of its flavor. For a quick, relatively cheap meal, El Mercado was perfect.

We had to be quick as we had to hit the 1:00 - 1:30 ticket pickup time at the pier to take the boat to Isla Magdalena. The 'tour' of the island essentially is a ticket for the ferry there and back, and some chaperoning during the walk around the island. The ferry itself takes about 90 minutes, and sadly there isn't too much more to it than transportation. There is some information provided via loudspeaker in Spanish and English on the penguins, the history of the island, etc., but given we were all a bit sleep deprived, it served more of a nuisance to our slumber than anything of true value. Then again there were a few questions we all had during our walk of the island that probably would have been answered had we listened.

Isla Magdalena itself was amazing, a perfect appetizer to Patagonian tourism. It involves some walking on an incline, but no real hiking. It gave us an introduction to the wind, but not so much so that it was unbearable without a handful of layers. And what made it truly special was those damn little flightless birds. It advertises itself as a (translated) Penguin Monument, and that is exactly what it is. To say there are penguins milling around would be a huge understatement. The island, at least the part cordoned off for tourists to walk through, is full of them.

The Magellenic penguins are medium sized for penguins, and are of the burrowing variety. Each couple has their little hole, and the timing of the visit coincides with child-rearing season, so each hole was hiding a couple penguin babies, in all their furry adorable-ness. The penguins must be very used to human visitors, and none seemed perturbed in the least, instead just going about their normal day. We saw penguin couples play-fighting, cuddling their babies, rhapsodically calling out to their mate who was off fishing that the baby was hungry, and general being as cute as can be.

The island tour itself is a cordoned off path that leads from the shore up to the lighthouse, which traipses along a few small hills with larger ones on the right side (during ascent). Every inch is seemingly housing penguin holes, penguins and penguin babies. In a sense, it does get a bit repetitive (they are after all, the same exact species), but the sheer number of penguin families give you unrelenting photo opportunities and a critical mass of penguins to see in any conceivable situation.

Our dinner, and my late-night drink, was a great capper to a first day in Patagonia. Dinner was at La Marmita, a place I found to be highly reputed across various sites & blogs for a pure Punta Arenas patagonian cuisine. It hit the marks as well, despite the clientele seeming somewhat touristy (though to be fair, that is what we are). The plating was also excellent, something the 'Chef's Table' watching person has come to appreciate. The only miss from a dish was the ceviche, which was just acceptable rather than great, but everything else was excellent.

The highlight dish for me was a Patagonian soup with llama and chicken meat and a host of vegetables and herbs, seasoned perfectly. Our mains were a lamb, cooked quite tender, a

For my late-night beer, I chose what was marketed as a craft brewery to my limited understanding. It did serve its own beer, and it was quite good, but it was more of a real resto-bar. The atmosphere was great. I arrived at 11:20 and left at 12:30 (when it was just getting fully dark), and the place was far more crowded when I left than when I arrived - and to my surprise a clear majority of the patrons seemed to be local. I had both their house IPA and Scotch Ale, and both were good. I was saddened they didn't have their stout on tap that night, but from tasting these two, I imagine the stout is good as well. They played a good set of rock music, and everyone seemed to be having a great time, and enjoying some delicious looking pizza.

My first night in Punta Arenas had two clear takeaways. First is that penguins are truly an unendingly cute species. Second, it is just weird being on this side of the world, in a thrilling way. As mentioned, in the literal sense, I've been further away from home many times - including earlier this year going to India for work. But I've never felt further away from home, in completely a good way. The food has ingredients like Llama and Conger Eel that I've never had before. The scenery was unique. The city itself reminded me a lot of Queretaro, the Mexican town I spent a few months working in, for all the right reasons. The only difference... we were hanging off the bottom of the habitable earth, and of all the things on this trip through Patagonia that I want to continue, it is that feeling.

My Top 20 TV Shows of 2017

5.) The Good Place (NBC - Season 1/2)

No surprise, the last time I had a show that was on a major broadcast network ranked anywhere near this high on any of my lists was another comedy that Michael Schur created. No surprise. Schur is the new master of network sitcoms mainly because he's added so many non-network touches. While Parks and Recreation became a masterpiece due to the unflinching optimism and heart of the characters, The Good Place became great due to the opposite. It is every bit as silly and irreverent and packed with jokes (including some Arrested Development-level visual gags and jokes), but here the characters are more gray, more selfish, and just as fun. The plotting is brilliant, from the reveal at the end of Season 1 that they were actually in the Bad Place, to the madcap nature of the first few episodes of Season 2 where evil demon Michael (Ted Danson at his best) re-sets them over and over again. We finally end with another great spot, with Michael now working with the four bad place humans, and the whole plan potentially unraveling. Plot is at often times the enemy to sitcoms, that have always been lagging behind drama in their move towards serialized storytelling, but The Good Place is actively challenging that. The episodes are called Chapters for christsakes. The acting on the show is great. Ted Danson is a National Treasure. Kristen Bell is slowly becoming one herself. The writing is punchy when needed, and silly when needed as well. Few shows have become such utterly joyous watching as the Good Place has.


4.) American Vandal (NETFLIX)

If you want to teach a class on how to make a true Mockumentary, this is the best example I've ever seen. Why? Never did anyone in it think it was a mockumentary, or realize the ludicrousness of what was going on, despite it being a long story about two sophomores investigating who drew the dicks. What made American Vandal so truly impressive was even when you remove the trappings of the mockumentary, it was a fantastic show about high school dynamics, in a year with a lot of them. The show's high school world was so filled with such memorable, great, small characters, like Crista Carlyle, the perfect girl slowly revealed to be a controlling gossip, to the cool teacher outed as a predator, to the teachers who immediately took sides and convicted the accused dick-drawer, to even the two documentarians, who had their own falling out that was played straight. The episode with the CSI-like examination of a house party might have been one of the best half-hours of TV about high school life ever. The actors, very few of them known or famous, fit that tapestry so well. The icing on this so very delicious, unexpected cake, was the tone that so brilliantly mirrored Serial, but in video format about a crime so stupid in its inanity to never not be funny. The lasting image of the show might just be the long running storyline of trying to prove the accused's innocence because he draws his prank dicks with hairy balls. Why? because the guys making the documentary beleived it, the school officials believed it to be valuable evidence. We all did. It made sense. Of course, who drew the dicks wasn't important; seeing how this documentary and crime impacted a high school world from teachers through officials to parents and children, was what made it special.


3.) Bojack Horseman (NETFLIX - Season 4)

Four years in, Bojack Horseman just gets better. It also gets darker, and wilder, and funnier and sadder. Bojack Horseman is falling further and further into what it set-out to be: a audaciously dark view of fame, of depression, or celebrity. The fourth season added in two throughlines that helped reshape the show once again, focusing on Mr. Peanutbutters run for Governor and then examining Bojack's past and future with the story of Hollyhock, his maybe daughter, and his mother. The show took more risks this season, having the first episode not include Bojack at all, and then the second only him interspersed with flashbacks of his mother's woeful upbringing. They had an episode where everyone was trapped uinderground in an earthquake. They had an episode set at various points in the future slowly revealed to be dreams from Princess Carolyn as she slowly comes to grips with her miscarraige. Darkness has pervaded Bojack Horseman from Day 1, but while earlier seasons (especially the 3rd) focused somewhat an surface issues like acceptance and celebrity and fame, this went more personal, and revealed a layer I didn't realize a show, nevertheless an animated comedy featuring anthropomorphic animals, could go, with more personal tragedy. Of course, it helps that the show remained wickedly sharp and funny, with the background animation gags at all time highs as they introduced more and more animal forms. Truly, I don't know how much darker the show can get without losing its comedic voice, but as it barrels toward that inflection point the show has only gotten sharper.


2.) The Deuce (HBO - Season 1)

I don't know if my expectations for a new show had ever been higher, but to see David Simon (and not to be forgotten George Pelacanos by his side) at the helm of a gritty period piece about Urban Americana was irresistible. Thankfully, the show lived up to every expectation. Obvious disclaimer, there is a lot of nudity and graphic sex in the show. It is about the rise of the porn industry justaposed with New York City's long, tenuous relationship with prostitution. But outside the trappings of such tittalation and you still have a incredible show, weaving a Wire-like tapenstry of gray characters across a beautiful set. From the prostitutes, each with their won grievances and drivers, to the pimps slowly seeing their importance reduced as prostitution made its way indoors, to the mob, to the brilliant twins played by James Franco trying to involve themselves, to the police. Every segment of The Deuce's world was spectacular.. Much like a season of The Wire, the show started with a slow burn before it really got going, but when it finally reached its crescendo, man was it special. Drawing up rich characters shouldn't be so difficult given the ample airtime TV shows get, but David Simon can make it seem so simple. Even Franco's lesser 'evil' twin became an incredibly rich and entertaining character by the seasons end, usurping his straight-laced brother in the criminal world. Seeing the cavalcade of ex-The Wire stars was also a thrill, especially the small roles, perfected by Anwar Harris's (Slim Charles) deli man. I am so excited to see where Season 2 goes.

Just like the Wire, it made you ask a lot of questions and rethink your opinions on what is normally seen as a seedy underbelly element. Seeing the humanity and at times drive of many of the prostitutes made you wonder if it should be legalized so they can get more protections. Seeing the rise of porn at a time when it was glamourized and could get willing participants, you do wonder if it offered a better life than roaming the streets for its actresses. For New York as a whole, you wonder how it ever left that world behind given the complicit police and the mob having their fingers in the pie. And through it all you wonder if it mattered. The Deuce asked a bunch of questions, and just the The Wire, it left most unanswered, allowing viewers to draw conclusions from its deep, beautiful tapestry it wove. Shining a light on the prostitution and porn world is, arguably, a step-up from the drug world, but just as corrupt, almost as interesting, and showed that Simon has an art for creating and driving powerful, complex female characters as well. In a time where the standard length of a show seems to be 10-13 episodes, and few shows have the material to fill those orders, I was so saddened The Deuce only got 8. It created a world I want to spend more time examining and watching.


1.) The Young Pope (HBO)

I think The Young Pope was the first show I watched this year, or at least the one that premiered the earliest in the year. I mentally pegged it far up the list then. Over the year so many came and went, and none reached the highs that The Young Pope did for me. The first year I did this in 2014, I put Fargo #1, an unexpected pleasure. Same with last year in The People v. OJ Simpson. The fun trend continues, as The Young Pope was just a masterpiece of entertainment. The best part of The Young Pope is how quickly it turns expectations upside down. The show starts with Jude Law's Pope Pius XIII addressing the crowd for his first address, telling them they should embrace masturbation, sex outside marraige, abortion, gays. Of course, this is a dream sequence. We then go to actual Pope, and he demands to have a Cherry Coke Zero for breakfast. At this point, you think 'Oh, I get it, this show is about a hip, brash Pope.' And then the show begins.

The Young Pope is fantastic for many reasons. The most lasting for me honestly was the soundtrack, a haunting, perfect mix of trap, folk and EDM. Next comes Law's performance as Pope Pius XIII, filled with the perfect amount of smarm and arrogance, making his scenes where he acts so deliciously condescending so brilliant. Having him interact and always be a step ahead of Voiello, or Sofia, the marketing lead, or even the leader of Greenland, was a source of never-ending joy. The scenes were just packed with wicked joy. Third on the list of features that made The Young Pope special was probably the cinematography. The airy way it was shot, with so much light enveloping the Vatican, making it seem like all a dream. And fourt was the subversiveness of the plot, with the Young Pope showing himself to be a staunch conservative wanting to return the church to an age centuries ago, and his older opponents (Voiello being the absolute best) wanting to move forward. I never really thought that a political drama of the modern church would work, but it did so brilliantly.

The show is coming back re-branded as 'The New Pope', likely without Law in such a prominent role, but The Young Pope did enough in that one season to be a lasting show for a while. It was on its surface a meme generator like few others, with Law's electric performance delivering cutting one-liners and snaps (or even Diane Keaton's Sister Mary, with her 'I'm a Virgin... But this is an old shirt' T-Shirt). But if you look deeper it was a masterpiece of film-making, a close to one of contained storytelling, with a long list of characters that spanned ages, positions of power, and even languages. I thought it had a chance to be at the top when it finished in March, and as the year went on nothing overtook it.

NFL 2017: Week 16 Power Rankings & The Rest

AFC

Tier I - "2018 Can't Come Fast Enough"

16.) Cleveland Browns  (0-14  =  207-362)
15.) Indianapolis Colts  (3-11  =  225-368)

There is a simple path forward for both teams. For the Browns, actually use your top draft picks and get a QB. For the Colts, do whatever is necessary, including dark magic and praying to all the Gods, to ensure Andrew Luck is back healthy in 2018, and Chuck Pagano is not the guy on the sidelines. If both teams do these simple things, they might find themselves not in this category through 14 games in 2018 (the Browns probably will).


Tier II - "Playing Out the String"

14.) Houston Texans  (4-10  =  319-380)
13.) Denver Broncos  (5-9  =  254-328)
12.) New York Jets  (5-9  =  285-342)
11.) Miami Dolphins  (6-8  =  252-342)
10.) Cincinnati Bengals  (5-9  =  233-305)

The AFC set of spoilers just seem so far less interesting and "spoiler-y" than the NFC counterparts. All these teams seem to alternate between frisky and completely packed in on a week to week basis, like the Jets getting shutout in Denver one week and playing the Saint tough the next. The highest ranked team is the one that has most clearly seemingly given up for the season, losing two games in a row by failing to show up and having Marvin Lewis retire. The Dolphins gave us all hope for a week, but returned to their 'worst somewhat close to .500 team in a long time" status they did so well to protect earlier in the season. Amazing how bad Jay Cutler looked a week after looking like 2010 Cutler. The Texans are just depressing. I realize they had some unfortunate injury luck, but that has been a common occurrence the last few years as well and they haven't gone away like this. Bill O'Brien may be able to convince ownership to throw that year out given the Watson and Watt injuries, but I'm not sure that is a prudent decision for them to make.


Tier III - The Wild Card Hopefuls

9.) Tennessee Titans  (8-6  =  296-319)
8.) Oakland Raiders  (6-8  =  281-324)
7.) Buffalo Bills  (8-6  =  264-306)
6.) Los Angeles Chargers  (7-7  =  311-255)

The AFC playoffs in reality have only one spot left to give. The only way that isn't the case is if Baltimore slips up against a really light closing schedule (IND, CIN). Assuming they don't, only one of these four will make it. The Raiders have close to no shot, but I want to quickly say how much they were robbed in that ludicrous game. Anyway, Tennessee was 8-4, but is staring 8-8 in the face. The Bills are staring 8-7 in the face with a trip to Foxboro coming up. The Chargers have the easiest remaining schedule (NYJ and OAK), but I can easily see a situation where they drop Week 17 to Oakland and ruin their chances. All I want really is the Titans to eff off and not make the playoffs. That team would be Wild Card Weekend roadkill. Luckily, the Jaguars have something to play for in Week 17 assuming they win this week and should not lay down against the Titans. Either way, I would welcome the Bills or Chargers in teh playoffs. This bad Tennessee team? Not so much.


Tier IV - Righting The Ship

5.) Kansas City Chiefs  (8-6  =  359-302)

Big question right now is have the Chiefs righted the ship. That 1-6 stretch will always tick out like a sore thumb at the end of the season, but this recent 2-game stretch where losing either one would have put them in tricky situation in the division (instead they more or less locked it down assuming they can beat Miami this week) is a strong recovery. The offense has come back to life, even including their loss to the Jets in that. The Chiefs figure to be the #4 seed, and are staring down most likely Baltimore in the face. The defense will be key, can they sustain this 2-game good stretch of strong pass rush and pressure?


Tier V - Rounding Into Classic Form

4.) Baltimore Ravens  (8-6  =  345-256)

The Ravens quietly are 4-1 in their last 5, with their loss being that blown game to Pittsburgh. Their offense has stabilized with Flacco stringing together a few good games in a row. Alex Collins is firmly entrenched as their #1. Essentially, they are rounding into form at just the right time. Their defense has always been great (entered the week #1 in DVOA), same with special teams. That offense was basically worst in the league for most of hte year, but even if they can be the 20th best offense, this is a scary playoff team.


Tier VI - The Contenders?

3.) Pittsburgh Steelers  (11-3  =  344-278)
2.) Jacksonville Jaguars  (10-4  =  374-209)

I honestly think New England will get pushed in the AFC playoffs this year. Certainly more than last year, and the improvement of Pittsburgh and the ridiculous Jaguars are the key reasons why. They are opposites in some senses, with the Steelers having a great offense that almost survived the in-game loss of Antonio Brown to beat New England, and a defense trying to stabilize without Ryan Shazier. Other than having no ability to cover Gronk, they had a good game against Brady and the Pats, certainly better than their history against them. The Jaguars defense is ridiculous. Opposing QBs have a 65.2 rating against them, and they've sacked opposing QBs 51 times. What really should frighten teams is that offense. Bortles has a 110+ passer rating three straight games. The OL has been strong all year long. Either team could give NE a run in Foxboro. Will they?...


Tier VII - Who Else?

1.) New England Patriots  (11-3  =  395-274)

Seriously, what other ways will the Patriots conjure up to win games before Brady finally ends this nightmare for all of us and retires? As for the game, the Patriots defense seems back to its porous self, but thankfully for them they got Gronk back.


NFC


Tier I - Turning to 2018

16.) New York Giants  (2-12  =  228-355)

I'm still so intrigued by the Giants plan for next year. The biggest question is obviously the future of Eli, but it seems fairly certain they'll be in position to draft a top QB. Even if they manage to win some games, all the other 3-or-4-win teams around them have established or young QBs. I have to think the Giants do this, take advantage of this unexpected draft position, and ship Eli to Jacksonville or Arizona, like all close to retirees do.


Tier II - The 4-10 Spoilers

15.) Chicago Bears  (4-10  =  234-294)
14.) Tampa Bay Buccaneers  (4-10  =  285-336)
13.) San Francisco 49ers  (4-10  =  253-337)

Oddly, I feel way more positive about this group of three teams than the two to come that are 6-8. All three have QBs they should feel at least comfortable with going forward in Trubisky, Winston and Garrapollo(sp?). Winston needs mostly coaching to drill his Cutler-esque mechanics and footwork out of him, but I do think the desire is there. With Trubisky and Garrapollo, it is just more time. I guess for Mitch, getting rid of John Fox and actually getting a coach who will let him throw would help as well.


Tier III - Staring Towards the Long Abyss

12.) Washington Redskins  (6-8  =  305-359)
11.) Arizona Cardinals  (6-8  =  246-337)

We get the two veteran teams with significant questions at QB and not a lot of great places to turn. I'm starting to think the Redskins just pony up and re-sign Cousins, but there is a cieling with that team. The Redskins seem like a more competent version of the Shanahan era team, but they are still one that plays too often less than the sum of their parts. The Cardinals have some youth, but are relying a lot on aging players (Fitzgerland, various defenders) with minimal cap room. Even if Palmer retires, their options at QB are mostly re-treads or mid-1st round pick fliers. The latter actually may be more worth their time to reset the direction of the franchise going forward.


Tier IV - The Rodgers Miracle Ended Quickly

10.) Green Bay Packers  (7-7  =  309-333)

The Packers didn't deserve Aaron Rodgers coming in like the Phoenix in the Chamber of Secrets and saving the day. Rodgers himself contributed to the loss looking plainly rusty and underthrowing two deep balls badly resulting in two of his three interceptions. The Packers are officially eliminated, and now the lens changes to if they fire McCarthy. If anyone can claim a mulligan given Rodgers' injury it is him, but I think there is a general apathy that has to be addressed in Green Bay.


Tier V - Four Teams, One Spot

9.) Detroit Lions  (8-6  =  358-339)
8.) Seattle Seahawks  (8-6  =  321-294)
7.) Dallas Cowboys  (8-6  =  336-311)
6.) Atlanta Falcons  (9-5  =  318-282)

Like the AFC, there are four teams still fighting for the sixth playoff spot. Assuming both New Orleans and Carolina win their respective games against the Buccaneers, they lock up playoff spots and let these four (all four being teams that made the playoffs last year) to fight for that last spot. If I'm one of the teams that could play them, I would welcome Detroit or Seattle at this point. Atlanta screams the scariest team (and if they win out they would win the division), but secretly it might be Dallas. With Zeke Elliott back this is a different team. They were a great team last year, had a good start this year, then went in a mess after the suspension finally hit. That's in the rear-view mirror now. Atlanta is in the clear driver's seat here with all them needing is one win, which they can somewhat give to themselves if they lose to New Orleans, clinching the division for the Saints (more or less) and then giving Carolina a chance to sit in Week 17.


Tier VI - The Great NFC South Race

5.) Carolina Panthers  (10-4  =  331-286)
4.) New Orleans Saints  (10-4  =  401-282)

So, there is a chance that if both of these teams lose to Atlanta that the Falcons steal the division, but what is more likely is the team to win the division is the one who beats Atlanta, understanding that if they both beat Atlanta, the Saints get it. This is also a very likely 1st round matchup as well, assuming the current Top-3 seeds take care of business. That is a shame, as I think both are worthy of winning on Wild Card Weekend and going forward. For Carolina, it is especially harsh given that they may match up better against the other three potential division winners than New Orleans.


Tier VII - The Emotional Toughness Quotient

3.) Philadelphia Eagles  (12-2  =  438-279)

The Eagles showed a lot of mettle coming from 20-7 down. Sure some of it was luck, with the blocked kicks, but it was also that offense continuing to thrive fully with their backup QB. The scheme and skill positions are in such concert right now. What is worth focusing on is the defense. Will they have an emotional letdown with the loss of Wentz. If anything, the impact emotionally is felt there more - on offense the Wentz loss can be corrected in a literal sense by Foles playing well. That first game was not a good sign, but seeing the offense still flow, the team still win, may push them a bit to restore focus. One win in the last two games gives them Home Field Advantage as well.


Tier VIII - The Best Team in a Tough Spot

2.) Los Angeles Rams  (10-4  =  438-272)

The Rams are, given Wentz's injury, the best team in the NFC, if not NFL to me. I realize Seattle is somewhat crippled at the moment, but that was harrowing in its dominance. They toyed with Seattle in Seattle, including a rushing TD on 3rd and 20. The defense is Top-5 in the NFL. The Special Teams is Top-2 in the NFL (only Baltimore comes close). Jared Goff is real in that he is good enough in the flow of that offense. It just hurts that they will likely have to go on the road twice to make it to a Super Bowl. That loss to Philadelphia will really hurt, a lose-lose for both teams given the Rams lost the game, and the Eagles lost their QB. The Rams DVOA through 14 games is in the Top-10 of all teams in the last 20 years. They probably aren't as good, but they have had a truly great season.


Tier IX - The Favorite?

1.) Minnesota Vikings  (11-3  =  343-242)

Another team that established a sense of dominance. The Vikings mauled the Bengals, and are a win away against either the Packers or Bears (at home) from a 1st round bye. While they too are playing with their backup QB like the Eagles, Case Keenum has had a great year and has been there for a while now. The defense is getting healthy and playing great. They'll be at home, with added motivation, as unquantifiable as it may seem, of potentially playing the Super Bowl at home. I still question it because the thought of Case Keenum in a Super Bowl is still a bit shocking, but let's just realize how good he's been this year.



Projecting the Playoffs

AFC

1.) New England Patriots  =  13-3
2.) Pittsburgh Steelers  =  13-3
3.) Jacksonville Jaguars  =  12-4
4.) Kansas City Chiefs  =  9-7
5.) Baltimore Ravens  =  10-6
6.) Buffalo Bills  =  9-7


NFC

1.) Philadelphia Eagles  =  13-3
2.) Minnesota Vikings  =  13-3
3.) Los Angeles Rams  =  12-4
4.) New Orleans Saints  =  12-4
5.) Carolina Panthers  =  11-5
6.) Atlanta Falcons  =  10-6


Looking Ahead to Next Week's Games


16.) Cleveland Browns (0-14)  @  Chicago Bears (4-10)  (1:00 - CBS)
15.) New York Giants (2-12)  @  Arizona Cardinals (6-8)  (4:25 - FOX)
14.) Denver Broncos (5-9)  @  Washington Redskins (6-8)  (1:00 - CBS)

I call it "Bad vs. Bad" Sunday, as we get only three games where no team has any shot at the playoffs. So happy there are only three here. The Browns have a winnable game, if the Bears effort from last week is any indication they may have checked out.


13.) Indianapolis Colts (3-11)  @  Baltimore Ravens (8-6)  (Sat - NFLN)
12.) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-10)  @  Carolina Panthers (10-4)  (1:00 - FOX)
11.) Detroit Lions (8-6)  @  Cincinnati Bengals (5-9)  (1:00 - FOX)
10.) Los Angeles Chargers (7-7)  @  New York Jets (5-9)  (1:00 - CBS)

I call it "One Bad vs. One Good, Pt. 1" Saturday and Sunday as we need two sets of these given how many there are. The first set features four teams still in the Wild Card (division in Carolina's case), needing wins here to push them forward. The Ravens essentially clinch with a win on Saturday. The Panthers actually clinch. Both should happen. The Lions have a classic trap game here, same with the Chargers, who as it is can be eliminated this weekend even with a win.


9.) Pittsburgh Steelers (11-3)  @  Houston Texans (4-10)  (Mon - NBC)
8.) Oakland Raiders (6-8)  @  Philadelphia Eagles (12-2)  (MNF - ESPN)
7.) Miami Dolphins (6-8)  @  Kansas City Chiefs (8-6)  (1:00 - CBS)
6.) Jacksonville Jaguars (10-4)  @  San Francisco 49ers (4-10)  (4:05 - CBS)

I call it "One Bad vs. One Good, Pt. 2" Sunday and Monday, as we have the second set. By the way, two Monday games because of Christmas! Sadly neither figures to be that competitive. The Eagles clinch HFA with a win. The Steelers somehow clinch nothing with a win given the Jaguars are one game behind - though that could be different if the Jags lose Sunday. The Chiefs clinch the division with a win.


5.) Minnesota Vikings (11-3)  @  Green Bay Packers (7-7)  (Sat - NBC)
4.) Los Angeles Rams (10-4)  @  Tennessee Titans (8-6)  (1:00 - FOX)

I call it "Elimination Upcoming" Saturday and Sunday, as... well actually since I ranked these, the Packers were eliminated with the Falcons winning on Monday. I'm interested to see if they even play him against Minnesota given that. The Vikings need that game also, to clinch a 1st round bye and get the chance to site people in Week 17. The Rams clinch the division with a win, and go one step further to the Titans not making the playoffs as they may somehow do despite being total 8-6 frauds.


3.) Buffalo Bills (8-6)  @  New England Patriots (11-3)  (1:00 - CBS)

I call it "Revenge tastes best on the scoreboard" Sunday, as the Bills get a chance to do a lot on one game. They need this game, as their clearest path to the playoffs involve them winning both games. they can still get in if they lose to New England and beat Miami, but for that needs the Titans to lose out. The Bills also get a chance to exact revenge after Gronk's dirty play two weeks ago. Hopefully they don't inflict literal revenge on Gronk because the league doesn't need that, but the best revenge for them is a win. Very unlikely, but not impossible given the Patriots have shown some chinks in their armor at home this year.


2.) Seattle Seahawks (8-6)  @  Dallas Cowboys (8-6)  (4:25 - FOX)

I call it "Better Elimination" Sunday, as we get a clear game where the loser can pack their bags for 2016. Technically, if the Falcons beat the Saints in the game still to come, the Seahawks and Cowboys are more or less done, but assuming that doesn't happen, this game gets really interesting. Also, I love the prospect of that battered Seahawks team looking for a pride performance against an Elliott-filled Cowboys team. Great game, even if before the season started we expected this to have more stakes than what it has now.


1.) Atlanta Falcons (9-5)  @  New Orleans Saints (10-4)  (1:00 - FOX)

The permutations and combinations in the NFC South is just amazing, even though the most likely scenario is all three make the playoffs. This game will be huge for one key reason, it clinches a playoff spot for Atlanta, and makes the Week 17 game of Carolina @ Atlanta for the division, and hte likely SNF game. At this point there is no great alternative outside that game for the season finale. The game itself should be great with both teams in decent form.

My Top 20 TV Shows of 2017, #10-6

10.) Nathan For You (Comedy Central - Season 4)

Prior to the season finale, I had Nathan For You ranked a bit lower, but the brilliance of that 4-part finale 'Finding Frances' was so good to elevate it up. More on the finale later, but first let's talk about the first six episodes. They were fine. They were hilarious. But they were a bit different than what Nathan had done previously. His ideas were the same, but now the central line was how far Nathan had to take each one to make it legitimate (creating a fake band to reclassify the Smoke Detector as a Musical instrument, or creating the fake newspaper to announce the name change of a man to the name Michael Richards as a part of his ploy to raise awareness for a restaurant getting a large tip from a fake Michael Richards). These gags and pushses were fun, but the simpler times from before I longed for. In reality, it's probably harder to get enough blind small business owners to take Nathan at his word. Anyway, the final episode was a true classic. The competing raw emotions, of Nathan's desire to help this sad-sack (supposed) Bill Gates impersonator find his lost love, at the same time weighing if the Bill Gates impersonator even deserved to find her. Then the whole sub-plot of Nathan with the escort. The show was so incredibly meta, it really blurred the line whether Nathan the character was pretending to fall for the escort, or Nathan the person, who has shown signs of loneliness throughout past seasons. The whole episode had that feeling, that are we getting a glimpse of the real Nathan? What the show lacked in pure laughs compared to previous years, it brought even more with emotional weight, and not fake weight as in previous years. True, actual emotional weight, culminating perfectly in that final episode.


9.) Stranger Things 2 (NETFLIX - Season 2)

My thoughts on Stranger Things Season 2 are really all over the map. On the one hand, I hated the decision to keep Eleven apart from the rest of the gang for such a long time, and was disappointed that there was nothing mystical or hidden about the two newbies in Max and her brother. I also found Mike a bit annoying this year, and it was a bit weird that the Murray character creepily plied two underage teens with alcohol and more or less suggested they should bang. On the other hand, my issues are pretty much limited to these minor points. (Oh, let's also look past that bizarre episode where Eleven goes to Chicago). The final few episodes of the season, specifically the 6th (the breach in the lab mirrored with Steve and the kids in the vacant lot) and 8th were brilliant. What the Duffer Brothers seem to understand is what makes their show great, and they turned it to, no pun intended, 11. Having Dustin start cursing, and being upset that no one remembers to call them 'Demodogs'? Brilliant. Having Nancy be awesome and give that pity dance with Dustin? Sweet. The great Lucas v. Dustin courtship? Great. The Steve and Dustin pairing? Inspired. The central storyline of the shadow monster inhabiting Will and the demodogs was a little much for my mind (liked the more contained, ephemeral Season 1 terror plot), but growth was needed. Stranger Things was the biggest surprise of the year probably in 2016. They followed it up with more comedy, more pulsating action, and utilized the brilliant set of child actors as well as ever.


8.) Better Call Saul  (AMC - Season 3)

Slowly but surely the two half-shows of Better Call Saul are coalescing, and I figure that stands only to continue in Season 4. However, for much of Season 3, it was still the Mike Show and the Saul (Jimmy) Show. Thankfully for us all, both halves are pretty fantastic. Given he is the titular character, it may not seem odd that the Jimmy/Saul half of the show is my favorite, but it is somewhat given how close to Breaking Bad we are getting in the Mike half now, with the entire Cartel gang alive and well (Hector, Bolsa, Don Eladio, and of course, Gus). But the Jimmy/Saul half is just so well played, a brilliant mix of grey characters from Jimmy to Chuck to maybe most of all Howard. The long storyline from Kim unable to let her common sense overcome her quiet love for Jimmy, or the incredible courtroom scene of Jimmy's ethics hearing and Chuck breaking down. And of course the capper that the second Jimmy comes to his senses a bit and undoes the Sandpiper Settlement that would give him a million dollars, Chuck gets his livelihood, his law career, stripped away and decides to (seemingly) kill himself, trapped inside a hollow home stripped of all electricity. The only thing keeping it from being higher up the list is the reliance on the more fan-servicey half on the Mike side. I understnad its place earlier on, but now you almost wish it just was two separate, still great, shows.


7.) Narcos (NETFLIX - Season 3)

I really liked Season 2 of Narcos, a great 'later season Breaking Bad-esque' showcase of the downfall of Pablo Escobar. I was a bit saddened knowing Season 3 moves beyond Pablo and to the Cali Cartel. I was even sad that they removed Steve Murphy as a character (might be alone in that). It took a while to rebuild my trust and love, but man did it ever. By the end of it, I was ready for more of the Cali Cartel (even if the set-up for Season 4 is in Mexico, likely). It is hard to describe why I enjoyed this season so much. For one, more is better than less with the central leads. While Pablo had a lot of second and third bananas, they were clearly that. With the Cali Cartel, each of the four main dons were well crafted, especially Pacho and Gilberto. The brief glimpses of Amado Carillo Fuentes. The government figures were even better than before. And while I missed Murphy, the two new guys in Fiestl and Van Ness added a lot of punch to the DEA side of things. Ultimately, what Narcos did well in Season 1-2 it continued to do well: like brilliant on-location cinematography in Colombia, to the great action sequences, to the unabashedly raw language used. All those are still there, and expanding the focus beyond Pablo allowed the story to grow the way it needed to in a way I never could have predicted when we left Pablo behind


6.) Big Little Lies (HBO)

There may be no show on the list that exemplified where TV is in 2017 better than Big Little Lies. Go back five years, and the idea of a miniseries with Nicole Kidman, Reese Witherspoon, Shailene Woodley and Laura Dern would seem impossible. Heck, go back two years. This all may have started with True Detective season 1. This was the female version, just also a lot better. All the leads were great, but so were their male counterparts, especially Stellan Sarsgard playing a truly monstrous role. I don't know if I've ever seen domestic abuse played so rawly, so brilliantly, especially when the female actress is such a name. The mystery itself might have had a all-too-cute ending, but the raw intensity of the group beating up Sarsgard character as payback for the abuse of Celeste and the rape, was raw and powerful. Sure, having this all happen against a tapestry of beautiful Santa Monica, with lush beach-side landscapes, was strange, but also serves to tell a story so rarely told, the silent horrors at times even in the most luxurious neighborhoods. It blended comedic elements well, such as everything really to do with Reese Witherspoon's character. I honestly have no idea why this show would consider a 2nd season. The first was excellent, made at just the right moment in time, with such awesome performances from a truly star-studded cast. Even if the change the formula, they should take heed with what happened to that male counterpart in True Detective.

My Top 20 TV Shows of 2017, #15 - 11

15.) It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX - Season 12)

There's a sad tinge writing about Always Sunny right now. It premiered very early in the year, and it may be a while before it is back, with or without Glenn Howerton who is unsure about continuing. Can't blame him. I'm sure no one more than him, Rob and Charlie thought they would get 12 seasons to tell their story. What is amazing is how when so many shows get stale when they cross even a 4th season (see Veep), the 'Dumb Seinfeld' show decided to get better, or at least more inventive. Somewhere around Season 7, when Mac got fat, the show has never been the 'watch five hilarious friends tend bar.' And while there may be some longing to those more simple days, seeing the creators actually create has been amazing. In the 12th season, they did a brilliant parody of The Jiux, a sharp look at black vs. white life experiences, a very serious look at whether hate speech has any nuance, to character studies of Rickety Cricket and finally Dennis himself (and Charlie less so who finally beds the waitress). To have creative imagination twelve whole years in is just ridiculous. They even did give us all our candy with one episode simply title 'The Gang Tends Bar' for those who longed for the day when they tended bar.


14.) Fargo (FX - Season 3)

Through maybe 5 or 6 episodes, this was quite a bit further down the list (as in towards the bottom quarter), but pretty much following the moment the bus crash occurs through the end the season caught life. The beginning half of the season was like a bleak facsimile of the brilliant show it used to be. The second half was right up there with those first two seasons. It was mostly Mary Elizabeth Winstead's character coming to life, assisted by Mr. Numbers from the first season, one of the two deaf henchman, coming back to take their revenge. It almost seemed as if Noah Hawley realized midway through that the supposed stars of the season, the twins played by Ewan McGregor, were fairly milquetoast, and the stars were David Thewlis and Mary Elizabeth Ellis, even moreso than Carrie Coon's detective Gloria Burgle. The plot was more streamlined than in past seasons, less strange diversions (great moments from the previous two), but the end-game was worth waiting for. Also, I really did enjoy the strange third episode where they left the Minnesota setting for once and had Gloria go to Los Angeles, and that was thrilling. Creator Noah Hawley has been ambivalent about bringing the show back (and is spreading his auter seed a bit further with Legion - personally found a bit too ambitious and overrated), and there are some diminishing returns, but the last three episodes, and the character arc of Nikki Swango were fun enough to rope me in to a potential fourth season.


13.) Silicon Valley (HBO - Season 4)

For the first time in the four years that Silicon Valley has preceded Veep, I found the former better than the latter. Sure, it is mostly about Veep falling off a bit and losing itself in plot, but I think Silicon Valley had a really strong season, mainly because an aggravated, relatively neutered Gavin Belson is a great Gavin Belson. The odd pairings made this season work quite well, whether it be Gavin and Richard, or Jianyu and Monica, or the continued greatness of Gilfoyle and Dinesh. Sure, the show hit reset over and over again, as it has always done and will continue to always do, but there seemed to be more joy in it this year. I can't see the show going much longer than this, and certainly losing Erlich will hurt, but with the growth of other characters they are better set to absorb it now. The show stretched credulity a bit this season, mostly with the ludicrous plotline of Big Head teaching a class at Stanford, but it was all in good fun, something the show sorely lacked at times in recent seasons that got a bit too far down before Pied Piper inevitably broke back. My largest criticism of the show is the emotional hearstrings have been pulled so many times their worn out at this point. If they can refocus on what they still do well: tremendous, quick humor, it can remain a great show for the planned duration.


12.) 13 Reasons Why (NETFLIX)

There are four shows on this list that feature non-adults (or at least majority non-adults). The first was Dear White People. The last two are still to come. 13 Reasons Why was the darkest, the most serious. One of the great elements of shows with kids and/or young adolescents is the unbridled joy whether in the performances or the environment. 13 Reasons Why was not that. It was the long story of a girl killing herself to start and unwrapping why she did. It is a great set-up for a show (and a novel which it was based off of). My only real complaint with the show, in truth, is that they built up to the idea that the tape about Clay would be so horrifying and dark, and in reality it wasn't nearly the worst of the offenses. What really impressed me about the show was how well acted it was given how dark the source material was. Katherine Langford, who plays Hannah (the victim), was brilliant. The actors playing Tony Padilla, Jessica Davis and Justin Foley were all strong. The adults in the room were also great (forgot how good Kate Walsh can be). The source material was interesting in the current climate too, uncovering how all the 'let teenagers be teenagers' can lead to some really dark places. I don't know if any show asked more questions than this one. There were enough critical thinkpieces to avoid talking about them, but I'll say it made me rethink what went on even at my high school. I have no need for the show to continue, which it seemingly will. I have no real expectations for that season. This was good enough for me.


11.) Game of Thrones (HBO - Season 7)

If not for the incredible stretch of reality that the second to last episode (the great Wight heist), Game of Thrones would be far higher up. Color me fairly intrigued for the penultimate season. We finally got so many great pairings that we all waited four or five years for, like Jon & Dany, or the Lannisters and Dany, or the great return of Tyrion to King's Landing. My favorite moment was when Dany's envoy (without her) and the Lannister meet in King's Landing and seeing all the old pairs from seasons past acknowledge each other (Brienne & Hound, Brienne & Jamie, Pod & Tyrion, Pod & Brienne). The big action sequences were so well done, from the 'Loot Train Attack', to Dany's various display of dragon bad-asserry. Even if the final R+L=J confirmation was more or less known for years, having it happen in reality was meaningful. What Game of Thrones has perfected is spectacle. As we head away from small moments, or random pairings driving storylines (everything with Arya and the Hound), we have started to rely on spectacle even more. The sheer amount of plot moving needing to take place over these 7 episodes and the next 6. But my lasting memory of the season will probably be the slow-played drama that took place at Winterfell, with the living Stark children reuniting after years in teh wilderness, and deciding to kill the scheming person who set this all up.

NFL 2017: Week 15 Power Rankings & The Rest

AFC

The "We Started Planning for the 2018 Draft Years Ago" Duo

16.) Cleveland Browns  (0-13  =  197-335)
15.) Indianapolis Colts  (3-10  =  212-343)

The Browns lost probably their best chance to win a game, but at least showed some moxie in the first game in the wake of their firing GM Sashi Brown. For the two clearly worst teams in the conference, they actually have some positives. The Browns have a boatload of picks and talent at places (especially defense). The Colts don't, but should, let's all damn hope, get Andrew Luck back next year, which is a better position than most 3-10 teams.


The "Mild, and I Mean Mild, Spoilers" Quinto

14.) New York Jets  (5-8  =  266-311)
13.) Houston Texans  (4-9  =  312-335)
12.) Denver Broncos  (4-9  =  229-315)
11.) Miami Dolphins  (6-7  =  236-318)
10.) Cincinnati Bengals  (5-8  =  226-271)

The back-half of the AFC is just sad. None of these is really any good. Ironically, two of them scored big wins last week (admittedly, Denver's came against one of the other in the bunch). They all have games that could screw over much better teams, but I have little faith in any of them. I think the Bengals are the best of the bunch, and if you turned 3-4 things around they may have been in the thick of the playoff race, but that listless loss to Chicago was almost stunning in its noncompetitive-ness. If you want to list a positive for each, I'll try. The Jets have shown great improvement at skill position and cornerback this year. The Texans have DeShaun Watson and JJ Watt waiting for 2018. The Broncos still have a defense that at its best can win games on its own. The Dolphins are actually still alive for the playoffs (but may be the worst playoff team in a long time if that happens), and the Bengals have the talent of an 8-5 team, and hopefully that embarrassing loss spells the end for Marvin Lewis. I like Marvin, I do, but it is just time.


The "Wild, Wild Fodder" Trio

9.) Buffalo Bills  (7-6  =  240-290)
8.) Oakland Raiders  (6-7  =  264-304)
7.) Tennessee Titans  (8-5  =  273-294)

Technically, this group includes the two current wild card teams if the playoffs start today, but I don't buy them, nor Oakland. The Bills are technically the 6th seed due to strength of victory (a far down tiebreaker), but the QB situation is getting dicey with them going back to Tyrod Taylor. That point differential is also pretty stark for a potential playoff team. The Raiders have the talent, but seemingly lost whatever cohesive drive that worked so well last year. They have an outside shot at the playoffs if they can run the table, but the chance of that emotionally flat team doing so is fairly low. The Titans likely need to win just one of the remaining three games, but that doesn't seem so easy now that the 49ers are reborn with Jimmy G, and the Rams and Jags likely have things to play for in the other games. With Mariota's injury lingering, that team is far less exciting to watch in a potential playoff game. Only silver lining if they get there is to wipe away one of the remaining streaks of years since making the playoffs (last done in 2008 for Tennessee).


The "It's kind of Sad the AFC West Came to This" Duo

6.) Kansas City Chiefs  (7-6  =  329-289)
5.) Los Angeles Chargers  (7-6  =  298-225)
If we go back to Week 2, the AFC West seemed like the strongest division in the NFL The Raiders were an impressive 2-0. The Chiefs an even more impressive 2-0 (beating New England and Philadelphia). The Broncos might have been an even more impressive 2-0 after hammering Dallas. The Chargers were 0-2, but lost both games by a field goal or less. Fast-forward 12 weeks and that division turned into a mess - almost guaranteed to provide the worst record of any division winner. The Chiefs may have righted themselves with a commanding win over the Raiders, and the Chargers have quietly been among the best teams in football since their 0-4 start, including having a clear Top-5 defense all of a sudden. I think both teams are better than their record, but it is a shame the record has fallen this far.


The "They may just do it Again!?" Uno

4.) Baltimore Ravens  (7-6  =  318-246)
Man, had the Ravens held onto that lead they would be looking mighty scary right now, with a great defense, excellent special teams, and an offense that had started to wake up. Where was the Joe Flacco that played against Pittsburgh before? Where did this vintage Joe come back from? If that guy continues and the Ravens sneak in (not impossible - sweeping three winnable games more or less guarantees them that spot) they may be quite dangerous. The loss of Jimmy Smith seems like it will be felt, as the Steelers abused the Ravens depth secondary. Then again, not every team is as equipped to do so.


The "Secretly, are they the best AFC Team" Uno

3.) Jacksonville Jaguars  (9-4  =  329-202)

Who has the best point differential of any AFC Team? Jacksonville. Who has the best pythagoreon win record? Jacksonville. Who has the best single unit of any AFC team? Jacksonville, with their monstrous defense that has help opposing QBs to a 66.4 passer rating, 13 TDs to 19 INTs, and sacked them 47 times. Even the offense has kind of stabilized recently, with Blake Bortles putting together a few nice games (and a legitimately good one against Seattle) and a healthy Leonard Fournette. The Jaguars path to a 1st round bye is fairly clear: win out and have Pittsburgh beat New England (or New England win, and Pittsburgh lose another game). If they do, I don't think anyone, including potential #3 seed New England, wants to go there and play that defense.


The "Openly, one of us is the best AFC Team" Duo

2.) Pittsburgh Steelers  (11-2  =  320-251)
1.) New England Patriots  (10-3  =  368-250)

Then again, 13 games in we are exactly where we thought we would be: the Steelers and Patriots are the best two teams in the conference and the winner of their head-to-head will be the #1 seed. No real surprise there. The Steelers grade out better in teh analytics than the eye test, with the Patriots being the opposite. Luckily for New England, the opposite generally can mean more.


NFC


The "Scouting for 2017 Began Right Now" Uno

16.) New York Giants  (2-11  =  199-321)

So looks like putting Eli Manning back in the starting lineup wasn't going to be a panacea. The Giants are a mess, they've cleaned house, but they have to throw out Eli as well. Not saying Eli can't be a decent QB somewhere else (Jacksonville jumps out), but its not happening in New York. They have to clean house completely, not try to hang on to vestiges of an era that was anyway just hanging on the vestiges of the real window that closed in 2012.


The "Evaluating the Future" Trio

15.) San Francisco 49ers  (3-10  =  228-314)
14.) Tampa Bay Buccaneers  (4-9  =  264-312)
13.) Chicago Bears  (4-9  =  224-274)

These three teams are not good, but all have interesting questions going forward, whether it be these last three games, or into next season. The 49ers seemed to have found their QB in Jimmy G. Two strong performances with him and already there seems to be a connection with Kyle Shanahan's scheme. If anything, it seems fairly certain this trade will work out better than the last time a team traded a 2nd round pick for a Brady backup (Chiefs with Cassel). The Buccaneers seemingly have their QB, but Jameis has regressed mightily in his third season. I still believe in him as a leader and player, but it seems his ceiling may be Cam Newton with a lower ceiling, or Roethlisberger with a lower ceiling. The Bears have their QB seemingly in Trubisky, but the main question is do they need to change coaching staffs? I believe they do, that the game has passed John Fox, and Trubisky won't flourish under him. But games like last week when they house Cincinnati may pain that a bit to where the Bears are fooled into keeping him.


The "Mild Spoilers" Duo

12.) Arizona Cardinals  (6-7  =  231-317)
11.) Washington Redskins  (5-8  =  285-344)

Neither of these teams is making the playoffs (luckily in the NFC we can make these declarative statements about 6-7 teams), but both provide enough matchup challenges to their opponents. They actually play each other this week, but the Cardinals have a chance to spoil Seattle's season in Week 17. The Redskins are playing no one with playoff implications, but the question for them becomes Kirk Cousins future. If they were a well run franchise, the Cousins decision would essentially be decided by now, one way or the other, but the Redskins are not one of those.


The "One of us could just sneak in!" Trio

10.) Green Bay Packers  (7-6  =  285-302)
9.) Dallas Cowboys  (7-6  =  316-294)
8.) Detroit Lions  (7-6  =  338-329)

Every team here on out is making the playoffs, or may make the playoffs plus wouldn't be a fraudulent wild-card fodder team if they do. The Packers seemingly will bring Rodgers back, throwing him to the fire knowing they have basically zero margin for error. I can foresee a situation where if he gets hit a bit, they lose the game, see their playoff chances willow away, and they site Rodgers the last two weeks. However, if they do run the table and sneak in.... For Dallas, the schedule is tough, but hte path is there with Zeke Elliott coming back after next week. The Lions to me have the strongest current resume, already have a win over the Packers, and have a high enough ceiling to go there. I give them the least chance to make noise if they get in, but I do feel people are understating their chances.


The "NFC's only hope to return ANYONE to the playoffs, and it may be the #6 seed" Duo

7.) Atlanta Falcons  (8-5  =  294-261)
6.) Seattle Seahawks  (8-5  =  314-252)

There is a very good chance the NFC only returns one of the six playoff teams from last year. The five teams ranked ahead of these two are all currently making the playoffs and didn't make it last year. The three teams in the previous group all made it last year, along with the Giants. This hasn't really happened ever. Given the Redskins slipped away, at the very least one of the teams is returning, and most likely it is one of these two. The paths are rather clear. They can afford to lose one game (but probably not two). They even have decent shots at winning their division. However, most likely they are the #6 seed in one of the most topsy-turvy seasons for a conference we've seen - surprisingly not impacting how good the top of the conference does seem.


The "Great NFC South Race... That's Probably Decided" Duo

5.) Carolina Panthers  (9-4  =  300-262)
4.) New Orleans Saints  (9-4  =  370-263)
The Panthers will not go quietly into the night for that division, and are ready to, no pun intended, pounce on the Saints hold if they slip up. Both teams have fairly clear landmines to slip up, including the Saints visit to Tampa (a place they've been so-so in historically) and hosting the Falcons, while the Panthers host the Rodgers-helmed Packers and travel to Atlanta. Both teams are validated playoff caliber teams, and I want them both in and wouldn't mind a round 3 in this rivalry on Wild Card Weekend.


The "Three Great Teams, Three Great Questionmarks" Trio

3.) Los Angeles Rams  (9-4  =  396-265)
2.) Philadelphia Eagles  (11-2  =  404-250)
1.) Minnesota Vikings  (10-3  =  309-235)

Man, that Carson Wentz injury really screws with things, huh? I think Foles will be acceptable at QB, and that the team isn't going to fall apart, but the NFC had a clear best team, and now they have three teams that by resume are the three best, but have significant questions. For the Rams it is can they beat the good teams. Their point differential is excellent. Their DVOA tops the league, and is Top-5 in each of offense, defense and special teams. But they've also lost their big statement games to Philadelphia, Minnesota and Seattle, and if they can't fix that and beat Seattle next week they can slip into Wild Card territory. For the Vikings, their resume is stellar, but questions are now coming back about Case Keenum after the loss to Carolina. Personally, they need to stick with Keenum. It's to late to change for 2017.


Playoff Projections

AFC

1.) New England Patriots  =  13-3
2.) Pittsburgh Steelers  =  13-3
3.) Jacksonville Jaguars  =  12-4
4.) Kansas City Chiefs  =  9-7
5.) Tennessee Titans  =  10-6
6.) Baltimore Ravens  =  9-7


NFC

1.) Minnesota Vikings  =  13-3
2.) Philadelphia Eagles  =  13-3
3.) New Orleans Saints  =  12-4
4.) Los Angeles Rams  =  11-5
5.) Carolina Panthers  =  11-5
6.) Atlanta Falcons  =  10-6 


Looking Ahead to Next Week's Games

16.) Denver Broncos (4-9)  @  Indianapolis Colts (3-10)  (TNF - NFLN)
15.) Arizona Cardinals (6-7)  @  Washington Redskins (5-8)  (1:00 - FOX)

I call it "Two Bad Games with Two Bad Teams" Thursday and Sunday, as when you get this deep into the season, ranking games gets really cut and dry. Games between two teams with no playoff hopes are pushed to the bottom. These two don't even have any interesting side-story going for it.


14.) Baltimore Ravens (7-6)  @  Cleveland Browns (0-13)  (1:00 - CBS)
13.) New York Jets (5-8)  @  New Orleans Saints (9-4)  (1:00 - CBS)
12.) Houston Texans (4-9)  @  Jacksonville Jaguars (9-4)  (1:00 - FOX)
11.) Cincinnati Bengals (5-8)  @  Minnesota Vikings (10-3)  (1:00 - CBS)
10.) Philadelphia Eagles (11-2)  @  New York Giants (2-11)  (1:00 - FOX)
9.) Tennessee Titans (8-5)  @  San Francisco 49ers (3-10)  (4:25 - CBS)
8.) Atlanta Falcons (8-5)  @  Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-9)  (MNF - ESPN)
7.) Chicago Bears (4-9)  @  Detroit Lions (7-6)  (Sat Night - NFLN)

I call it "One Bad Team vs. One Good Team" Saturday, Sunday and Monday, as the next set is the games between one bad team with no playoff chances versus one that does. I had no idea how to rank most of these. The dour Cleveland gets last place. Then comes a whole host of games with teams that are more or less locked into the playoffs against bad ones. Finally, three games where we get teams that are not assured of the playoffs against a worse opponent. Interesting one is Tennessee, who is playing nothing like an 8-5 team against a 49ers team on a 2-game win streak with their shiny new QB in Garroppolo. Finally, the Lions who are clinging to life against the reborn Bears looking to pull a 2nd straight spoiler-riffic upset. Also, Saturday football is back!


6.) Miami Dolphins (6-7)  @  Buffalo Bills (7-6)  (1:00 - CBS)
5.) Dallas Cowboys (7-6)  @  Oakland Raiders (6-7)  (SNF - NBC)

I call it "Loser Leaves Town" Sunday, as we get two games between playoff contenders where the loser is more or less done (maybe not Buffalo, but probably even them too). The Dolphins and Raiders get their shot at going back to .500, but are probably underdogs in these games. The Cowboys seemed to have righted the ship just in time to welcome Elliott back next week, but need to get over this trap game to make that even matter. Cowboys @ Raiders can be an interesting night game in a season of night games that looked great before it started. Very few lived up to the hype, and while this game featured teams that were 13-3 and 12-4 last year, the game retained a lot of meaning.


4.) Green Bay Packers (7-6)  @  Carolina Panthers (9-4)  (1:00 - FOX)

I call it "The Triumphant Return or the End of Such Things" Sunday, as Aaron Rodgers is eligible to return. It seems clear he wants to come back, and any shot of a playoff push rests on his shoulders. Brett Hundley did an admirable job going 3-4 in his action, but the last two wins were in OT against bad teams. That won't beat Carolina, who solidified thier spot last week. If anything, Carolina is a team that can beat a Rodgers-led Packers team, and especially get after him with a Top-5 pass rush. It will be interesting to see if the Packers bite the bullet, knowing a loss here more or less ends their chances anyway.


3.) Los Angeles Chargers (7-6)  @  Kansas City Chiefs (7-6)  (Sat Night - NFLN)
2.) Los Angeles Rams (9-4)  @  Seattle Seahawks (8-5)  (4:05 - FOX)

I call it "LA Dreaming" Saturday and Sunday, as we get two really nice games that can go a long way to settle the winners of the West divisions, featuring the LA teams playing on the road. The first game may settle the division. A Chiefs win gives them head-to-head sweeps over both LA and Oakland, and puts them a win away from clinching. I don't have the math PhD necessary to tell you what happens if the Chargers win, but gives them a great position. The real great game is the Rams @ Seahawks. Somehow, despite their woes, a Seahawks win at home gives them the season sweep and an inside track to a home playoff game. A Rams win more or less settles the division, one they deserve to win anyway. I'll be pushing for the two LA teams. I'm sure they won't both win. Hopefully one does.


1.) New England Patriots (10-3)  @  Pittsburgh Steelers (11-2)  (4:25 - CBS)

I call it "One of the biggest Regular Season Games in Years" Sunday, as instead of trying to break it down (its Patriots vs. Steelers, the Pats will win like always), I'll try to come up with the most recent regular season game that was more important. Some for historical reasons could be pushed up, like any team that reached this point 13-0 and had games to threaten perfection (The 2011 Packers losing in this spot, or the 2015 Panthers losing the following week). But neither of their opponents were playoff contenders. The closest that came to mind was the Week 16 game in 2008 with the 11-3 Panthers playing the 11-3 Giants in New York, where the winner would clinch the #1 seed. There was a 2015 game in Week 16 where a 11-3 Bengals team played a 10-4 Broncos team. That ended up deciding the #1 seed, but at the time seemed it would decide the #2 seed, but the Patriots would blow the Week 17 Game in Miami. There's really no recent comparison excluding win-and-you're-in Week 17 games or games chasing perfection, since that 2008 Week 16 game.